Warm sand meets my bare feet and tells of losses, of sorrows but now also hope. The sea might have taken all away, but writhen canopies murmur soft songs of consolation in my starving ears. Filigree shadow patterns on the ground remind me of the way your hair used to dance in the ocean breeze, and I can hear your laughter in the wind. Memories of screams and tresses of your dying hair plastered to your skull are waning as striations from your nails are becoming faint lines on my muscular forearms. They are my victory-insignia to your wanton chicanery.
Copyright John Nixon
Not even this beautiful picture could refrain from from going really dark. Last week I tried to read as many as I could, and my sincere apologies to any I never visited.
Friday Fictioneers under the great leadership of Rochelle has developed to a be a community of 100s of entry every week. We try our best to tell a story on 100 words. I try to meet the requirement exactly, and this time I did.
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March 26, 2014
Björn Rudbergs writings 
Good story, Bjorn. It was descriptive and poetic, even if dark.
Ah.. thank you so much… I look forward to an evening of reading
i love the word filigree….and interesting how the warm sand on barefeet is loss…its not what i would expect and i like that…the laughter in the wind/scream another nice contrast…
Filigree is a perfect word for poetry…
wow, Björn! way to take my breath away.
Ah.. I look forward to get goosebumps from reading yours.
Well, hey. If you have to go dark, go dark. I have many times. Good work!
Thank you 🙂
It may be really dark, but I love it. Such a vivid description, you took me there with you. Nicely done!
Thank you.. I hope I didn’t bring you any frights..
Just the usual piercing screams by night, nothing more…
Too briliant for words! You built that up so well you may be getting a visit from the NSA if a woman goes missing near you… ¤¤¤PS – for any other readers – Disclaimer: this comment was to be read as a compliment and is not indicative of any real life situation in any way¤¤¤
Thank you… Somehow this style fits me…
You really loosed your poetic side on this story, Bjorn, and it worked so well. You’re the second person to use “writhen” this week, which was a new one to me (and that’s not easy to do.) Your lovely language worked well to hide what was really going on. The only quibble I have is in the second sentence, I think you could use a comma for clarity. You have “The sea might have taken all away but writhen canopies…” which made me on first and second reading think that all went together and I was looking for “,but” where the sentence ended. A comma between “away” and “but” would take away that possible misreading. 🙂
janet
Thank you for that suggestion.. It’s a great suggestion.. and I will update accordingly.. The reason I used writhen is that it was in John’s name of the picture.. so there is the source… Word was new to me as well.
🙂
Yes, dark, but very poetic in its imagery!
Ah. yes you know a poet when you read it… prose-poetry is quite fun to write.
The right kind of dark I think. It suits the picture. I really enjoyed this.
I wonder why it’s so easy to see darkness in pictures like this.. hmm.. maybe it’s just FF-mode..
what vivid imagery – I want to know so much more about what’s going on, but not at the expense of any of this. You give us just enough. Nicely done
Ah.. yes there is a dark story behind all this… thank your for the kind comment.
I loved the last line…victory insignia to your wanton chicanery. Nicely done.
Ah.. yes .. sometimes it’s fun to read dictionaries…
You are a master of love-turned-dark! But now I wonder if your wife ever chastises you for that???
Not yet… I think she hasn’t read them yet..
Beautifully written with fantastic descriptive prose. Loved it.
It’s fun to treat the prose as poetry.. keeping attention to the beat of the text, and use repetitions… actually with a few linebreaks it would sometimes become poetry.
Nice poetic narration… I guess its your dark glasses that turn everything dark ! 😉
Beautifully written and expressive.
Beautifully written, Such poetic prose and yet so dark and violent.
Like a horror-poem, if such a thing exists. Very dark and lovely.
Hauntingly powerful, Björn! Really stunning, this week.
This is the kind of picture that begs for a dramatic, dark murder and you delivered. 😀
That’s one dark take on the prompt.Loved it.
you have a way with words that’s beyond description. a creepy tale told in a soothing manner.
Whew, that is quite the morbid story. Though, you articulate it so artfully and delicately. Brrr. I’ve got the chills now!
ah. yes to do tender stories of murder is a little bit of a speciality of mine..
Beautifully written, quite lyrical and enchanting even though it is so dark.Loved it.
Dee
Haunting, intense, beautiful.
Your writing is very high standard for me. Dictionary helped me. I feel inadequate to comment.. Beautiful use of words. Like reading a poem.
Dear Björn,
You’ve turned prose into poetry and madness into dark beauty. Well done. His lack of remorse is stunning. Well done.
shalom,
Rochelle
Quite a work of art!
You did go dark – and managed to include one of my favourite words: filigree. Nicely done as always, Mr Rudberg 🙂
I’m afraid mine was dark too – yours is very good, as ever.
Hi Bjorn,
Nice reversal. At first, I thought he grieved over her loss, but the ending was a revelation. Ron
that’s what i was thinking, but i wasn’t sure, so i started reading comments to see if anyone else saw it that way too. so now i can be sure i was right. thanks.
You know I love a dark tale – and I think forests and woods lend themselves to that approach. As ever, you weave a wonderful tale.
Masterfully done Björn! One of my favs this week.
Oh Bjorn!This is the reason why I love your work so much-beautiful language hiding such darkness-loved each and every word!I hope someday ,many years later,I can write something similar 🙂
Great contrast between the ‘filigree shadow patterns on the ground remind me of the way your hair used to dance in the ocean breeze’ and ‘tresses of your dying hair plastered to your skull’
Beautifully written
Your contrast of beauty and horror is stunning… it makes the ending all the more powerful!
Horribly dark. I think I may be losing my taste for tales of husbands killing wives and vice versa, but this writing was beautifully poetic — I expect nothing less of you, darling.
So much powerfully packed into 100 words. Very intriguing!
Bjorn, this reads like poetry. I especially like the “writhen canopies.” Loved it all. It’s definitely one of my favs this week.
a mesmerizing story so well done, Bjorn. love this!
Bjorn, I didn’t know you were a student of Macabre and you do it so well! Great job – creepy – creepy, love it! Nan 🙂
Wearing those claw marks as a victory insignia. She must have really needed killin’
You have an awesome way with words…I couldn’t even go there. So I’m glad I can enjoy your remarkable talent…
A dense piece full of startling imagery. Great piece.
(I don’t get to read all every week. Like you I do my best.)
in the first line, should “tell” be “tells”? it feels that way, but maybe i’m reading it incorrectly. it’s a shame that her “chicanery” was too much for him. however, we can’t really know if she went too far or he had self-control issues. either way, she’s gone, and he’s dealing with it. well done.
You are quite right.. Tells is correct… I assume no chicanery could really motivate those stritions.
To a reasonable mind, definitely. To a disturbed mind, well, anything can happen.
Oh wow. That really is dark. What did she do? Or is the just not a very nice man? I’m left with the image of those fading scratches and feeling slightly unsettled 😉
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