Every Friday authors from around the world gather about the virtual fireside of fellow WordPress blogger Rochelle Wisoff to share flash fiction stories of 100 words, all inspired by a common photograph, and exchange constructive criticism. Readers’ comments are also welcome. This week’s photo has been provided by writer and intrepid bargee, Janet M Webb. Thanks, Janet. Here’s the story that Sandra’s photo drew from me:
Evensong
“How crimson the bud-tips on that young apple.”
“There’s all sorts of new growth in the woods, Eve.”
“Don’t we have a lovely glen, Adam? Look at that pool, it’s molten gold.”
“Better get back, …house needs a ton o’ work. And no tools, ‘less I find some abandoned ones.”
“Let’s gather wood; we need a fire for the soup.”
“Straight after Evensong.”
They joined the others standing hand-in-hand on the riverbank. They silently contemplated the three shopping trolleys,while the birds sang. After a short while they embraced, then dispersed, to continue the work.
Ann Isik
100 words
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Poetic Mapping: Walking Into Art 
Have to ask–what happens when the apple ripens? Good story of new beginnings.
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Well, hopefully the post-apocalyptic apple tree’s fruit is not forbidden. If not, my characters had better watch out for snakes. 🙂
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a fresh start for the world (and for evil too) a unique tale with lovely language 🙂
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Thanks for the input. 🙂
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Love your blending of history, fantasy, and sci-fi… seamless and poetic, while telling a good story, as well. Very atmospheric, Ann. Love this.
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Thanks for the kind comments. Appreciated. 🙂
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Dear Ann,
Your words evoked a new world rising and the flood waters receding. Very good use of language in this piece. I imagined a new Eden and a fresh start. The snake is out there somewhere, isn’t it? Peaceful and thoughtful. Loved your title, too.
Aloha,
Doug
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Hopefully the snake drowned. Thanks for your insightful (as ever) comments, Doug. Ann
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Dear Ann,
A different take on the prompt. Sounds like a colony starting over. Loved the surprise of finding they weren’t THAT Adam and Eve. Nicely done.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I hope they aren’t THOSE two troublemakers, especially with that flourishing young apple tree in the vicinity! Thank you kindly for the comments. Ann
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You always manage to come up with something different Ann, and this week is no exception. Very well done.
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Thanks Sandra.
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A new world/Eden after the apocalypse? Despite that, it has a lovely, peaceful feel to it.
janet
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Yeh, but there’s that baby apple tree about to burst into bloom! Ann
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Didn’t you see the sign? “Do Not Eat Under Pain of Eternal Death”?
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Nothing to do with me. 🙂
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I love the dialogue and after second reading, got that the new home Adam and Eve were building was a new Eden – sorry but it is late here in the UK.
Well done, very enjoyable
Dee
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Thanks Dee. I’m in the UK. SE England. And I’m burning late night oil too (but a day later than you). These shopping trolleys have triggered a wide variety of stories. I envy you your long Welsh beach walks.
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You put me in a kind of trance with this one, Ann. I love the description of them holding hands along the riverbank among the trolleys and birds. Mine isn’t so peaceful. I loved your take on this.
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I hope the trance has worn off. 🙂 Thanks for your kind comments. The setting is meant to represent a new Eden. Is it so peaceful? I wonder. Adam and Eve and a baby apple tree? 🙂
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Is it not peaceful. Maybe I need to reread? I still thought of it as such…maybe now that the trance has worn, I will revisit it! It’s something about the word “riverbank.” That does it for me every time!
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Absolutely love this.
Great story, great dialogue, great wrap-up.
(Tiny pedantic point, sorry, but birds sung should be birds sang.)
In no way lessens your tale.
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How embarrassing for a proofreader. Of course, it is ‘sang’. I’m getting my singing mixed up: birdsong, evensong, sang is the past tense of ‘to sing’ and sung is the past participle: i.e. have sung. (And as a singer, I use the verb on a daily basis)! Groan! Thanks for pointing it out. Thanks for reading. Ann
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Oops, I had mentioned to someone else in a reply about going to Bay St Louis, Mississippi in the summer of 2007 and doing a Habitat build. The devastation, almost two years after the eye of Katrina went through, was something else. The prompt brought those images back to my conscious thought.
Jim
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Sadly, I think the prompt has triggered a lot of not-so-nice images. Let’s hope it’s cathartic.
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Wonderful! The stream of unspoken yet evident faith, “Let’s gather wood; we need a fire for the soup.” “Straight after Evensong.”, stood out to me.
Thank you!
Jim
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Thank you, Jim, for your kind comments. Nice to meet you. 🙂
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I maintain that you have a glorious grasp of language. Just your sentence construction gives me goosebumps. This was wonderful.
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I’m all puffed up with conceit. Or it could have something to do with just having done my first round of a gym in 30 years. Ann
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